vnesateox: ONE IN A MILLION

Hi, I guess I will be blogging more often right now as.....

IT'S THE HOLIDAYS! F'YEAH!!!!

And... I have got a small dedication for my boyfriend. ;)

We finally went out like after so many donkey years omg. We met up at NEX and went to Mos Burger for lunch. :-)

To be very honest, ever since the End Of Year Examinations got nearer and nearer, we don't really hang out anymore. We call it "keeping a distant from each other so that we could concentrate more on our studies". Yes, we met and talk in school but it was only like for a 15 minutes or so... IT SUCKS!!! But at least we wished each other good luck and all the best. That is what I can only ask for during the exam period. I didn't want him to get distracted or anything....

So.......... I got pretty paranoid and insecure at that point of time when we were not spending time together anymore. I don't know why, part of the reason is because of my monthly "BEST" friend and the others, were just my thoughts that have been running through my mind at that time. I don't get myself sometimes too... I know he is sick and tired of me repeating the same things over and over again. I trust him, with all my heart. BUT, he didn't reply my text for like HOURS, it felt like years though, so I kept spamming him with texts and calls. He got annoyed and we quarreled pretty much everyday. Things happen, bad things happen. We didn't bother to talk things out because it was the exam period so we both simply just close one eye and wait till when the exams are over, we will talk about it...

Up till now, TODAY was finally the day that we went out for a proper lunch!!! Probably the best day of my life. We finally talked things out and everything was okay. I love all our heart to heart talks that we always have in the past, and today? HE HE HE we talked about hell loads of things. I was happy, he was happy. We were both joking with each other. Argh I am so glad that we are back to normal right now. I know you all are probably wondering why I am so fucked up and being such a bitch but never mind... HA!

Walked around NEX and he talked about getting his ear pierced, he asked if it will hurt or not, I said no and I used my nails to pinch him on the earlobe and said "IT IS JUST LIKE A LITTLE ANT BITING YOU LAH BABY" DANG IT, his reaction was so cuteeeeeeeeeeeeeee. YES CUTE!!! But I think his parents will probably fuck him up if he got his ear pierced. WE TALKED, LIKE A LOT..... About life, about us, about ourselves, about what we are going to do... I AM SO GLAD I MET HIM. :')

Hi boyfriend!

If you are reading this,

I want you to know that you are the best thing that has ever happened to me.

The very first day when we met, we were joking with each other about you buying all the pink stuffs to make me jealous, and trying to gain every girl's attention.... It was pretty awkward when I first talked to you.

I know you love me very much and you are sick and tired of my bullshits, insecurities and paranoia.

I am sorry, that you have to put up with all this shit. But I am glad that you endured and assure me with your words. Though we had lots of ups and downs, and trust issue is what breaks us apart... I hurts me, hurts me so much to see you ignoring me sometimes when I really need you by my side but I know you are stressed up because of the examinations, don't worry, I feel you baby!!! And I know, it sucks to have your girlfriend by your side to fuck you up and doing anything that will make you feel like shit hehehe.

You are my world, a part of my world. You are my best friend, my boyfriend, my shopping buddy, my comfort and my strength. You bring me happiness, you make me cry, I feel bad about me, myself, being a bad girlfriend but I still love you more and more every single day.

The bond that we have, nobody can break it, NOBODY!!!

Yeah, I know I might be the crazy, paranoid, insecure and mind-controlling freak, and sometimes I have this kind of thoughts... "Wait, why did he love me!?!?!?" Not many guys can be as faithful as you, you know?! Being together with a crazy bitch like me must be really very hard for you...

You know I can do anything to find out the truth right, so don't you dare lie to me!!! If you lie to me ah, YOU'RE DEAAAAAAAAAAAAD DEAD DEAD DEAD. Hahaha just joking.....

I don't get you sometimes...

When you say you don't care the first second, and the next, you get mad at something that I do... Yeah yeah, it's sweet but really kind of complicated to understand what you're feeling or what is going on in your head!!! I am complicated!?!?!?! You are more complicated baby. ;-)

Every instinct of my body is telling me to be careful sometimes, because the promises you made, you'll always break it.

And, you know yourself I can't risk myself getting anymore heartbreaks because I can break down any second... Everybody makes mistakes, everybody lies, everybody breaks people's heart. But you need to know that you can't always fix my heart every single time after you break my heart, and even if you did, scars are still left behind. I may forgive, but I definitely CANNOT forget.